Dou Loux loves cats, too!

This weekend I may go with my friends in Dou Loux to paint some pottery! I feel like this is going to be a huge disaster, thus making you all laugh at me in a later post. But I would like to introduce you to Dou Loux

Dou Loux consists of my very best friend, Melanie, and her fiancee, Byron. These 2 are such a power team. Anything that is creative that you can think of – they can do. Crafty, hair styling, drawing, cooking, graphic designey, webby sites, all of it and more. Champions I tell you, champions!

You must check out the current stuffs they have for sale. And now I will bombard you with all of their internet lands:!/douloux

Click those bitches!

I don’t really know what else to say except for, amazing. And you’d be an idiot to not buy something.

(No picture of a cat today, but if you check out Dou Loux, I am sure you will see a cat sticking its tongue out)

cats can’t reupholster because they have no thumbs…but I do!

Let me introduce you to the place I sit and eat. (Disclaimer: If you are offended by animals at the dinner table, then I would never read my blog again.) This is my seat. That is my cat in my seat. This is an often occurrence. When I am ready to sit down, she normally moves into the other chair, which we call, “her seat”. Anyways. On to the disaster story of the day…

My mom gave me this table and chair set, which is a very well-made set. But I am sorry mom, the cushions were not my style. Perfect opportunity for a crafting disaster project! I took myself to the fabric store and picked out the one that made me the most dizzy. I have no clue how I measured for the perfect amount of fabric, that normally doesn’t work out in my favor.

Luckily, Joe’s mom came over that night and helped me with a plan to get the fabric nicely onto the cushion. The one she did fit perfectly and looked amazing like an ice cream sundae on a warm caturday afternoon. Now it was my turn to tackle the rest of the chairs…

Backstory: Joe and I had 2 roommates, Frank (who has a sweet mustache) and Amanda (who sings everything she says). Both from Essex, Maryland. When they moved in, Frank said to me “Oh man, Amanda is going to teach you so much Essex language”.

I googled for an example of some “Essex language” so you can get an idea of what I am talking about: “Oh my gawd, Tommy! Dat guy in da South Pole shirt just sed scuse me and shit and I dint move-tryin to walk an shit- an he said it ‘gen and kepp goin”! (Disclaimer #2: I am not trying to offend anyone here, Amanda talks just beautifully, but having this information is going to make the next part of the story give you a chuckle…)

Back to the story…

Amanda is helping me now with “reupholstering” (I don’t know why I put that word in quotes, it’s just such a strange word to me) these chairs. We’re having a crazy old time trying to get the fabric to sit right and this is how the conversation goes:

A: “Pull it taught”

Me: “What?”

A: “Pull it taught!”

Me: “Is that an Essex word?!”

A: “What? No! Pull it, tight!”

Me: “Did you mean to say tight instead?”

A: “No, you’ve never heard the word taught?!”

… there you are people. I was really hoping to learn some “Essex language”, but a “real word” will do.

Overall, our reupholstering project was a success. If you look underneath of the chairs, it definitely looks like a hot mess. But who will be looking under there? Besides the cat of course.

(Disclaimer #3: When I refer to “we” or “our” in a project, it usually means the other person did most of the work.)

To show you that we put this bad boy to use. (Bad boy meaning the table and chairs) Here is what I ate last night, this is something I actually know how to make:

(Oh boy, I need better photography skills. At least I caught the cat in the background.)

Pasta noodles (that I never cook all the way), tomato basil sauce (that I spilled all over myself), left over chicken, and a bag of frozen stir-fry veggies (that I put in the microwave). Yes I eat it out of the pot, why waste another dish?

cats can’t cook…and neither can I…

In the second grade, I met Tisha. We have both made it to be a quarter of a century old together, bravo! In the fourth grade, we decided we shouldn’t be partners together for school projects. This is because of my lack of craftiness. She learned quickly to not let me cut anything or it wouldn’t be straight, to not let me attempt to draw straight lines (even with a ruler), to not let me paste anything or you would see the glue or tape seeping out from behind the object, and so on. Thank jeebus she learned this about me early on, otherwise I don’t think we would have made it to a quarter of a century old together.

The moral of the story is, I’m not allowed to do anything crafty alone. Some sort of disaster always happens. The irony here, and not the Alanis Morrisette kind of irony, is that I went to design school. How did I make it through 4 years of art school being crafty-capped? It’s a good thing I took a liking to coding instead of designing. (Thanks, Mark!)

This same rule applies to cooking. Now that I’ve been out in the real world away from my easy-mac making college student friends, everyone is so creative with their food. I thought, hey with the use of the Internet, I could be creative too! Yeah, no, the Internet fails me every time. Although I never even mastered how to make easy-mac so maybe I shouldn’t be trying harder things.

A project of mine never starts without calling my mom first and never ends without my boyfriend, Joe, walking in on the wack-ass final result. I feel sorry for them. Lucky Tisha, she never had to live with me.

During the project is the best part though. My cat, Bull Dozer (Dozey for short), is always there for me along the way to step all over the pieces of my project. Or waits to try a bite of whatever I made. She is the real champion in this process of mine.

(Screw everything I just said, this blog is to make Dozey famous, somehow, someway!)

If you’re into laughing at disasters, fowl language, and cats – then stick around!